Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
Randomize
