I'm laying in your front yard are you home
bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
I smell like Dick and happiness
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
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