just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
Randomize
