I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
Randomize
