Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
Randomize
