just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
I'm going to get so drunk tonight, I actually feel bad about the 30 seconds of drunken awkward sex I'm going to have with one lucky fat chick.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
Randomize
