i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
Last time Jon threw a party I woke up on my porch, no shirt but 4 bras on, and "make better life choices" written on my stomach in sharpie
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
Randomize