Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
Four minutes until I can fart!
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
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