sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
Randomize
