just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
My apartment stinks of burning failure
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
