there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
