Dude my date hates me, Im on a rooftop full of Turkish people, and Ricky Martin is blasting on the radio. I was wrong earlier when I said I have my shit together
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Randomize