I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
I woke up after 12 hours of being wildly intoxicated, got jizz on my face, and woke up in a different bed than I passed out in. My makeup is still perfect. I'm writing Revlon a thank you note.
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
