i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Randomize
