yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
Randomize
