someone threw a dead crab at me
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
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