Me. At least after what I've been through.
i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
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