I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
Jelly. This is your "are you still alive" text. Any response will do.
Hey I found a cat!
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
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