so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
Never drink rum straight from the bottle, even if people say it'll make you a pirate. It won't: it'll make you a bumbling shitfaced idiot who just drank rum straight from the bottle.
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
Randomize
