The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
The squirrels are partying on my roof again. Now they're just rubbing it in that I'm home alone on a Saturday night and they're having orgies.
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
Randomize
