you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
Randomize
