i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize
