I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
Randomize
