So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
death, taxes, and me drunk texting you are 3 certainties in life
Randomize
