i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
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