I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
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