absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
you didnt know i had herpes?
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
Google Maps needs to have a hungover setting. That bitch talks too loud and all I want is breakfast tacos & a bloody fucking mary.
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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