How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
My liver just broke up with me...
Last night was an abortion. I might need a publicist.
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
The uberlube is also flammable
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
