My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
just woke up in my car, in front of the bar. Took me 10 minutes to find my keys which were about 10 yards away in a bush. According to my phone records, I called my ex 14 times last night. Breakfast?
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Randomize
