I want to walk on stilts...naked
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
Randomize
