Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
Randomize
