In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
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