come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
Randomize
