We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
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