I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
I just woke up to three voicemails from you. In the first one you just straight laughed for 3 minutes. In the second you did bird calls. In the third you were hysterically crying. Have fun last night?
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
PANTIES FOUND
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