I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
Randomize
