I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
Randomize
