he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
Randomize
