one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
Randomize
