I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
no. you can't hotbox the world.
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
On the plus side, he ate me out and gave me an orgasm. But he also talked about robots during sex and mispronounced it like the dad in the goldbergs and called them “robits”
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