I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
Randomize
