it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
Randomize
