he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize
