How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
Randomize
