I can't watch pbs sober anymore
Pants 0. Shit 1.
yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
Police were just in my backyard to recover a loaded .38. What the fuck?????
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
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