I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
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