We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
i need to put some appletini on your dick
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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