I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
Oh god it's open bar.
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
Randomize
