I just saw a hot homeless man
Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
Randomize
