haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
